War On Everyone

Ostensibly a black comedy buddy cop movie, War On Everyone is an ugly, immature film that seems overly-desperate to offend and be silly, kind of like an annoying child who really, really wants your attention and won’t stop until you wearily succumb, the will to resist sapped from your body. Alexander Skarsgård and Michael Peña play the two policemen in question – the former lives alone in a swanky but near-empty luxury apartment while the latter is a family man, of sorts – and while they’re generally breaking all the rules with regard to petty criminals in Albuquerque, New Mexico they get caught up in one of those generic criminal plots involving some hard-nosed bad guys, but none of that matters. It’s not very funny, the screenplay is a mess, it’s directed straightforwardly and without panache, and despite the efforts made in casting two usually-likeable leads the film’s inherent nastiness cannot be masked and it all becomes tedious very quickly. Writer/director John Michael McDonagh, who made The Guard and the excellent Calvary before this, has taken a big step backwards, populating his film with lazy stereotypes (the Huggy Bear-style informant, the Irish rogue, the English bad guy, etc.) and throwaway shite we’ve seen far too many times to find interesting in 2017, like scenes set in strip clubs for the sole reason of upping the semi-naked female body quota. Fuckawful. (*)